Too much of a good thing


We’ve all heard that one before, right?  Maybe it’s about food; maybe fun; maybe even love.  I’ve got a new one to add to the list.  Read on…

I’ve blogged a number of times about my intense loyalty.  To people, to places and to products.  While there are some concessions I’ve made to inflation and brand names, there are certain products that I’ve been using since my parents were making the choices for me.

One of my untouchable brand products has always been Saran® brand cling wrap.  All other wraps paled in comparison.  Saran wrap would cling to anything!  It was my “go to” wrap.  Foil is great for a lot of things, but for universal use, freezer or fridge, you can’t do better than Saran wrap.

Decades of use had gotten me comfortable with the occasional “Saran snarl”, that annoying moment when the Saran wrap, eager to get to work, wastes no time and clings to itself.  This leads to a few moments of desperate efforts.  Those first few seconds are critical; for if you don’t “save” the wrap immediately, it’s lost and you might as well move to another sheet.

In the past year, I noticed more and more of these snarls occurring.  Perhaps my skill was waning.  Perhaps the makers had decided to defeat potential competitors by becoming even more “clingy” (we’ll use ad speak here instead of real English).  Whatever the case, I got to the point where my frustration finally outweighed my loyalty and I committed the blasphemous act of trying a generic brand cling wrap (I couldn’t bring myself to use the competition’s brand; that would be adding insult as well).

I found the wrap to work sufficiently well and with considerably less snarl problems.  I came to believe I could live with this wrap and even brought over a box to my last girlfriend to try after a dinner with her family (yes, I know, other guys bring flowers or wine, I bring cling wrap…what can I say, we were an unusual pairing).  She was unimpressed with the quality and returned to Saran brand (though I don’t believe my bringing that over was what caused us to break up…although, you never know, as I said, we were an unusual pairing).

I continued to buy this generic brand of cling wrap without incident until just recently.  Wrapping up some deli meats and cheese, I became embroiled in a cling battle of nearly epic proportions.  Never in my history, nay, perhaps in anyone’s history, has there ever been such a time!  The wrap would come off the cutting edge and move instantly to a snarl.  I tried to trick it by placing it on the counter and pulling it down off the edge but it used the subtlest air movement from the air conditioner to billow and fold upon itself.  After some extended moments, I managed to wrap the food.

Glaring at the box, I observed no change to the labeling or packaging.  This was the same cling wrap I had used for months.  I can only assume, like my former decades long friend, the generic brand had been “improved” to be more “clingy” to match up better with the brand names.

Not all improvements are for the better, however.  In this case, it was too much cling to be a good thing.

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