Miss Communication

Miss CommunicationGoing to the doctor is no laughing matter.  As hard as it is to read the scribbles on the prescription sheets, sometimes the conversations are just as confusing.  Like these, for example…

A doctor gave a patient six months to live.  At the end of the six months, the patient hadn’t paid his bill, so, the doctor gave him another six months.

While the doctor was talking to me, his nurse came in and said, “Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he’s invisible.”  The doctor said,  “Tell him I can’t see him.”

Another time, a man came running into the doctor’s office and yelled, “Doctor, doctor! – my son just swallowed a roll of film!”  The doctor calmly replied, “Well let’s just wait and see what develops.”

One patient came in and said, “Doctor, I have a serious memory problem”  The doctor asked, “When did it start?”  The man replied, “When did what start?”

One time a patient told his doctor he had a ringing in his ears.   His advice:  “Don’t answer it.”

Another patient said to his doctor, “Doctor, I think I’m a bell.”  The doctor gave him some pills and said, “Here, take these — If they don’t work, give me a ring.”

A guy told his doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.  The doctor simply said, ” Go sit over there. I’ll deal with you later.”

Finally, when a patient told his doctor that he broke his leg in two places, he told him to stop going to those places.

You know, doctors can be frustrating.  You wait a month and a half for an appointment and then he says, “I wish you had come to me sooner.”