Fear of flying


 It’s looking very much like I will finish the book this week, so I think it’s time to spend the time blogging about writing.  Welcome to “Writing Week” on the JMD blog.  Now, read on…

I have been struggling for some time with the final chapters to Book 2 (What Next?).  I don’t know how it works with other writers, but for me, the thing holding me back was mainly fear.

I wasn’t afraid I couldn’t write the last chapters.  Heck, I had them all mapped out in my head, scripting and re-scripting them almost daily.  What gave me the chills was that I wasn’t going to write them well.

That may seem silly to you, or amatuerish to experienced authors, but there it is.  I had a big finish planned for the characters, all of them, including some big revelations and I was worried I wasn’t going to be able to pull it off.  So I was hung up on the linchpin chapter that involved a seaplane and…well, you’ll have to buy the book, now that the dam has broke and I’m writing again.

In some respects, the feeling echoes how I used to feel when I was drawing.  The image I visualized in my head was clear and exact.  Sadly, my drawing skills were not up to Jeremy’s standards and I would sometimes feel I “left” something out of the final art.

My facility with words is defter than my drawing skill and my personal expectations are likewise greater.  Whether from a lack of confidence or a misplaced desire to please readers, those expectations create pressure and, in this instance, stifle my creative progress.

It took a bit of perspective to remember that I had these same feelings at nearly the exact stage of Book 1.  Somehow I managed to overcome that and create a satisfying conclusion to that book.  Guided by that knowledge and truly excited about my proposed ending to Book 2, I “forced” myself back to the writing pad.

And here I sit, taking time out to do a quick post but mentally fixed on closing the book on the closing to the book.  Now that I’ve managed to take my writing “off the ground”, it’s time to finish up and bring it in for a smooth landing.

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